Giving New Meaning to “Flow”

I don’t know why, but for some reason it seems that men who play helmet sports are infatuated with their hair. Take hockey or lacrosse for instance — my guy friends in college were obsessed with having the perfect “flow.” Personally, I think having great “flow” borders on having a mullet, but I guess it’s important (and apparently intimidating?) to have some of your luscious locks peaking out from the bottom of your helmet. Ah, yes, the sign of a true stud…

But it’s Troy Polamalu, safety for the Pittsburgh Steelers, who takes the cake for his flow. Polamalu’s ‘do is a billowing mass of thick, fluffy, perfectly wavy, and ridiculously long black hair — we’re talkin’ the gold standard of intimidating flow. If you strapped two coconut shells and a grass skirt on him you could almost mistake him for a hula dancer…almost.

The most ridiculous thing about Troy’s hair, besides the fact that he even chooses to have it, is that last month Head & Shoulders insured it for a million dollars! Although, I suppose it’s not that much, considering Tom Jones has his chest hair insured for $7 million. Talk about a sex bomb!

I don’t even really know what it means to have your hair insured…if he chops it all off and donates it to Locks For Love, does the policy carry over to the next owner? For answers to this question and undoubtedly many more that you didn’t even know you had, you can follow Troy’s hair @tpolamalu or visit its very own personal website, www.troyshair.com.

Posted by Hannah

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