First, There Was Shakespeare, Then Hemingway, Then… Snooki?
Yes people, the Apocalypse is upon us and the gates of hell have opened, in the form of bookshelves donning the literary works of *cringe* Jersey Shore cast members: Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi and Jenni “JWOWW” Farley are *gulp* authors.
The first, A Shore Thing by Ms. Polizzi, is a moving novel about a young girl “Gia”, living in a summer-house with seven of her peers, just looking for love and a good tanning salon. A story so well written, you’d swear you’d seen it play out before your very eyes. Amazing. The piece is almost as moving as the novel Britney Spears and her mother wrote in early 2000 (yea, remember that gem?).
Then, there’s the highly anticipated self-help book from Jenni “JWOWW” Farley, The Rules According to JWOWW: The Shore-Tested Secrets on Landing a Mint Guy, Staying Fresh to Death, and Kicking the Competition to the Curb. As if the title doesn’t tell it all, this must-read will teach you everything you need to know about getting a man, ladies.
While we’re on the topic here I, too, am working on a book. Well, my two-year old cousin is anyway, I’m just helping her write it. The first rule we’ve come up with: anyone who signs their name in all capitals should never produce any kind of literature. Ever. And rule #2: anyone who wears clothes so ripped they look like they got in a fight with Edward Scissorhands need not give advice on staying fresh to death (I can handle that on my own, guurl). I could go on, but I’ll spare you the rant. In short, let’s just say I would get in a car with Lindsay Lohan driving the wrong way down the freeway before I took dating advice from, or read the literary works of, any Jersey Shore cast member.
But hey, at least it wasn’t Angelina, right?
Posted by Courtney