A Sartorial MotherChucker

The Guys From Gossip Girl

Like any good, girl’s girl between the ages of 14 and 64, I reserve a special place in my cold, almost-dead heart for Gossip Girl. Since my not-so-stealth pilfering of the Cecily von Ziegesar-scribed books from my younger sister, I have followed the Gossip Girl series from the Young Adult section of Borders to the OMFG-inspiring TV series. As a “true fan,” (read: one that has—albeit pathetically—been borderline obsessive about the “scandalous lives of Manhattan’s elite” since long before anyone knew the name Leighton Meester) one of my main gripes is how the TV series veers away from the books. Though I’m most likely alone in thinking that the Gossip Girl books are on literary par with James Joyce and Joan Collins (I have diverse tastes, so what?), there really isn’t that much to improve upon. It’s fiction perfection.

One glaring exception: Chuck Bass.

In the books, Chuck is some lame, peripheral character who rides around town with a pet monkey perched on his shoulder. Bizarre? Yes. Good for TV? The CW doesn’t think so.

Ah, Chuck Bass. What a character. I sincerely hope Ed Westwick knows the only reason girls are having sex with him is because of Chuck Bass.

Which brings me to my point: A good 90% of the Chuck Bass character is wardrobe. Without the ascots, smoking jackets, pastel-colored pants and artfully-mixed patterns, Chuck Bass is merely a d-bag with a soap opera-esque, incestuous obsession with his stepsister and a penchant for Thai hookers.

And the brilliant people over at What Chuck Wore understand this. They pair pics of the sartorial MotherChucker like the one above with hilarious commentary like the following:

“Nathaniel, trust me. The popped pink collar is a solid decision. I’ve already slept with three girls today and it’s not even noon. Come back to me when you’re wearing a velour hoodie; maybe then you can start dispensing fashion advice. Maybe.”

If nothing else, Gossip Girl is a breeding ground for satirical spin-offs and acerbic observations, and What Chuck Wore nails it.

Posted by Amelia

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Posted By: marketingmarlo

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