I Do Tube

Image source The New York Times 

I’m not going to lie. Every now and then, I wish there was some miracle option that could magically eliminate 10lbs and let me skip the gym for a few weeks. It would be pretty nice….but not realistic. Yet it seems that more and more, it’s all about the quick fix. No big surprise there, as we’ve become a society obsessed with instant gratification. But in the last few weeks, the pills and the crash diets have become child’s play. The latest in extreme weight loss now involves the same tools used to get nutrients to the unconscious or those suffering from debilitating illness. No joke.

The “Feeding Tube Diet,” also known as The K-E Diet, essentially uses a feeding tube to help mentally unstable folks lose an absurd amount of weight in a short period of time, such as young brides who see this as the best way to drop up to 20lbs in just 10 days (“You don’t alter Vera to fit you, you alter yourself to fit Vera!”). No actual food is eaten with this method; instead, the tube, attached to a bag of solution, delivers just 800 calories of fats, proteins, and water. The body is forced a state of ketosis which then burns fat instead of carbs.

It’s pretty effed to see those in the medical profession actually partaking in something so dangerous. Whatever happened to that pesky little oath doctors take? And, ladies, if you want to go all psycho diet on us, why bother with a tube up your nose when you can do it up Tracey Gold style in For the Love of Nancy, the made-for-TV movie that taught us all what can happen when you limit your food intake to a saltine and piece of cheese. This time, I so joke.

Posted by Haley

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Posted By: marketingmarlo

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